Conquer Club

Let's just say it's your normal boxing ring, 12 rounds. Who would go the distance and beat the brakes off the other?

I'll update this weekly. (Or whenever I feel like it).

Round 14 - Coming back by popular demand! CC users that would win in a bout with one another! This time its Pack Rat vs Pmac666! Grumpy old fart vs esgelord name! Who is getting their dentures replaced?! You decide!

1st Round Winner - Ralph. Though that wasn't really a challenge to begin with.

2nd Round Winner - Duk! Kind of shocked. Thought the irish midget from boston could beat some old fart with a pace maker to death, but hey, McGregor loses to some dork named "Dustin."

3rd Round Winner - Confederate. By a landside. JP4 tries to talk some gibberish to Confederate, but Confederate counters with ALL CAPS AND INANE BABBLE ABOUT THE LEFT, before delivering a swift kick to the testicles.

4th Round Winner - Koolbak. Fucking destroyed me, then bought me a beer. I'll take the loss like a champ!

5th Round Winner - Hitred! Turns out, Hitred doesn't appreciate the competition, and in a twist of events, calls a crusades and beats Owenshitter like the man owed him money. That'll teach him.

6th Round Winner - TeeGee! Mookie tries to write an erotic novella about TeeGee and bigWham but TeeGee bans him from life. Take that, Stephen King!

7th Round Winner! The Drama Llama! Razor just couldn't handle a man's man. After smoking the biggest doobie, llama stumbled and headbutts Razor! What a shame. A travesty!

8th Round Wiener - Saxi! In a surprised turn of events, Saxi creams his pants at the sight of JB. Feeling absolutely disgusted by this...thing, JB knocks himself out! What a show? I guess? Idk, I might go vomit.

9th Round Winner - Da Pookster - This was completely lopsided. Mookie basically stabs JP4 in his testicles, and not only did that cause excrucating pain, but JP4, who is so full of air, SKYROCKETS out of the arena! A truly spectacular victory! Well played Mookie!

10th Round Winner - Icepack! By some friggin' miracle, and in an act of pure desperation, Icepack picks up on the art of necromancy, and in a strange twist of events, revives a good chunk of CC users he's "banned" for being multis with the promise of free premium. I hope you're all happy with yourselves! This is a dark day in CC indeed! You all make me siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick!

11th Round Winner - Duk again! Bunch of cheating mods around here, I tell you! RISE! RISE UP! DOWN WITH THE MODS!

12th Round Winner - JP4! To no one's surprise. After JB found our his wife's affair with JP4, he rage quits CC in an attempt to "That'll show em!" Well played you soulless ginger, well played!

13th Round Winner - Sleepy Joe! He finally wakes up, flies over to Saxis resident and absolutely beats the brakes off that little shit! That'll teach you, ya f*ck!

My guess is ralph ejaculates first... does this mean he wins or losses?

Ralph talks a good game… but his cockiness may hide his true inadequacies.

That said Saxi has never pretended to be physically tough in any way.
In my mind Saxi is 60+, 5ft 4” and weighs about 145lbs.

So even if Ralph is a pussy, which I suspect he is, he’d still kick Saxi’s ass because Saxi is barely a man at all.

Dwarf Kombat League!

mookiemcgee wrote:My guess is ralph ejaculates first... does this mean he wins or losses?

More details please.

DirtyDishSoap wrote:

mookiemcgee wrote:My guess is ralph ejaculates first... does this mean he wins or losses?

More details please.

He ejaculates in his own underwear, because the wrestling involved the most skin to skin contact he's experienced since he was breastfed.

feeling Ralphs wetness bleeding through his own clothes makes Saxi hard, but not enough to ejaculate himself just yet. Once Saxi wrestles him to the ground and gets on top, Ralph attempts a triangle choke which triggers Saxi to ejaculate as this feels alot like his autoerotic asphyxiation fetish.

An image approximating what the 'fight' looks like after completion:

LOL!

Mookie, i think you missed your calling in writing erotic novels.

DirtyDishSoap wrote:Mookie, i think you missed your calling in writing erotic novels.

Those are written by women mostly, we already have one fake woman here, I think that's enough.

Maxleod wrote:

DirtyDishSoap wrote:Mookie, i think you missed your calling in writing erotic novels.

Those are written by women mostly, we already have one fake woman here, I think that's enough.

In this day and age, everyone is a woman, a budlight can, a meat popsicle or a granola bar

I voted for saxi. He's awesome.

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Dukasaur wrote:Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Both could beat saxi in a fair fight?

In my play 'Wotcha! Gotcha!' there's a pub called 'The Raven and Writing Desk'. You could ask there.

bigtoughralf wrote:

Dukasaur wrote:Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Both could beat saxi in a fair fight?

Have you even been in a fight, brah?

Other than with your sister?

Saxi, everyone here besides you and some other deluded fool thinks you stand a snowballs chance in hell to win in anything physical.

Im gonna move this poll forward and onwards.

saxitoxin wrote:

bigtoughralf wrote:

Dukasaur wrote:Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Both could beat saxi in a fair fight?

Have you even been in a fight, brah?

Other than with your sister?

When we played WWE I made her cry, so don't get too cocky now.

Why didn’t you put me up against that Sad Sack JP4Misery?

I don’t wanna beat up Duk… but f*ck it, I will if I have to.

1) I’m American he’s Canadian… unless we are on ice playing hockey he’s just not gonna be aggressive enough. The fight would be over before he even knew it had started.

2) He’s some sort of public sector employee who drives a truck. There’s no way he’s in good shape, I think he’s admitted as much on here. He’s probably only a few donuts away from cardiac arrest at rest, let alone what happens when adrenaline hits his bloodstream.

3) I’m Irish (Heritage) from Boston… fighting is like the primary pastime for my peeps. Plus I have 5 older brother growing up.

The ONE thing he may have going for… he’s talked about leaving home at a young age and basically living on the street (or close to it) if I recall. So that experience in his teenage years may have hardened him a little. That said we’re talking the “mean streets” of Canada, so how tough could it have actually been?

I stick with my initial call… he’s out before he knows it. If you put us on ice skates he may have a chance. I can skate but there was no fighting allowed in junior leagues so I have no experience fighting on blades. Though I have used the “jersey over the head” move in college fights getting drunks out of my apartment.

I've seen the DoD. Granted, I haven't seen you. However, solid vote for the DoD here I'm not afraid of pain but I sure AF wouldn't poke that bear unless I was armed. And 30 feet away.

jonesthecurl wrote:In my play 'Wotcha! Gotcha!' there's a pub called 'The Raven and Writing Desk'. You could ask there.

Will you please ghost write my erotic stories DDS is going to publish?

Only if I can star in the movie version.

jonesthecurl wrote:Only if I can star in the movie version.

You will have to talk to the director @Koolbak, I sold the movie rights to @Mrsdyk's company 'Underage Productions' and don't really have any say in casting that's entirely her/thems fiefdom.

Sorry, no goofy accents in this bit....

KoolBak wrote:I've seen the DoD. Granted, I haven't seen you. However, solid vote for the DoD here I'm not afraid of pain but I sure AF wouldn't poke that bear unless I was armed. And 30 feet away.

Just because you’re afraid of some Canadian Teddy Bear doesn’t mean I am… I think he’s more likely some other kinda “bear”… the kind that twink boys like Saxi salivate for, not the kind that are tough in a fight.

jimboston wrote:Why didn’t you put me up against that Sad Sack JP4Misery?

Because that would be a no brainer.