Conquer Club

"Don't bother crouching, these crabs jump 10 feet!"

Edit: Damn, I posted that months ago already.

"Don't use this toilet paper!"

Next to "We need more gold"

"Due to lack of interest tomorrow has been canceled"

My favourite toilet graffiti was inscribed in a cubicle I used on several occassions for emergency defecation. Over the course of the recent Iraq conflict a great deal of ink was spilt on its door by various young men of strong political persuassions who scrawled endless propaganda about the merits or demerits of the American led coalition's actions, over several weeks the door became thick with long strings of debate, argument and political comment, which was really quite coherent for lavatory discourse.

Eventually some young wag ruined the entire thing by scrawling across the entire door in thick red paint "Your mum sucked Iraq's dick"... murdering the whole faux-intellectual spectacle. The sheer bloodymindedness of it made me laugh so hard that my stomach hurt the next day...

Ahhh, they were happier times you see, far happier times...

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/graffiti.png
That would be awesome.

In a porter potty (sp?)

Person 1: "f*ck america, go mexico!"
Person 2: "If you like mexico so much, why do you live here?"
Person 1: "So I can kill everybody here"

In a bus-stop in the new forest:

'Adrian R thinks hes a traveller but hes not hes a fucking jamrag and hes got a fat fucking nose'

i did take a dump there, so it counts

in a stall at a train station

lifes a bitch then you marry one and f*ck another

"I'm going from here not very delighted.
I meant to shit but all I did was farted."


People say that Croatian poet Tin Ujević wrote that little poem on the door of the bathroom in some bar. Anyway, it sounds better better in croatian...

This poem recalls the days of the pay toilet.

"Here I sit all broken hearted, paid my dime and only farted. Last time when I took a chance, I saved the dime and shit my pants."

In our student union they recently replaced a lovely fair-trade cafe with a branch of Wrapid (which, for those who have had the displeasure serves boiling hot crap in a wrap... not a patch on the old place).

In one of the ornate Library toilets a revolutionary had scrawled 'Boycott Rapid! and another had added 'Facists!', to which one of the mor economically minded students had written 'No... they give unlimited free refills on soft drinks ...'

Those toilets are ridiculous, actually. They're buried in the depths of the library and one actually has a bath... very harry potter.

When you say bath do you mean an actual tub or just a shower?