Conquer Club

This photo:



Take it as a challenge. Or just have some fun with it. I need answers to steal!!!

"Honey, I know that I lost my job, we are default on our mortgage, and we have no money left thanks to our pinko communist government, but look, Obama's long arm of social equality will always provide for us!"

Am I the only one that thought something was weird with that waiter?

You know what they say about guys with long arms......

black elk speaks wrote:"Honey, I know that I lost my job, we are default on our mortgage, and we have no money left thanks to our pinko communist government, but look, Obama's long arm of social equality will always provide for us!"

That actually ain't bad . .

You wont believe how he stirs the soup.

I bet you think that is his "arm"

...he used to be a policeman...

OR

"I didn't think the Fantastic Four had day-jobs"

"Gerald..."
"Yes dear"
"We're going to die, aren't we?"
"Yes Maud, I believe that we are"
"..."
"..."
"Hold me"

woman: What's the chef preparing?

man: I don't know but he'd better hurry up, I'm starving!

arm: Go, go gadget hydrolic arm.

or....

woman: What's wrong honey? Something on your mind?
man: Yeah, if the chef burns the roast again, I'm gonna knock his teeth out!

Jimmy: "This new zoo resturant is the worst! A dog for a host, that's not sanitary!"
Rachel: "Just look at me dear. Don't.....turn.... around...."

Jimmy: "WTF is up with this carpeting? It's so gaddam fugly!"

Jimmy: "WTF are you looking at b*tch? I'm right here!!!" *slap*

Rachel: "What's propping up our side of the table? I only count two legs..."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! FREAKS IN THE KITCHEN!!!!!" *vomits*

jonesthecurl wrote:...he used to be a policeman...

darn you...

"Gerald, don't look now, but Reed Richards just stole your dinner."
"..."
"..."
"Twat."

Skittles! wrote:"Gerald, don't look now, but Reed Richards just stole your dinner."
"..."
"..."
"Twat."

umm... pssst... genius... the plate is moving towards the table... just thought you should know.

black elk speaks wrote:

Skittles! wrote:"Gerald, don't look now, but Reed Richards just stole your dinner."
"..."
"..."
"Twat."

umm... pssst... genius... the plate is moving towards the table... just thought you should know.

Really? I must have missed the nine foot high neon sign saying that.

See, I realise that the implication is that the arm and plate are indeed moving towards the table; but because this is a competition about creativity and originality I chose to think a little bit outside the box, shake things up a little. Y'know, I thought I'd actually have a go at being original and creative, try to expand the possibilities for comment, make things a little bit more interesting for all concerned. I imagined that people with semi-functioning brains would be able to figure that out without having it spelt out for them.

Oh forget it, all of the above are completely alien concepts to you aren't they? This is about as fruitless and exercise as lecturing a sub-normal toddler on the finer points of quantumn mechanics.

Skittles! wrote:See, I realise that the implication is that the arm and plate are indeed moving towards the table; but because this is a competition about creativity and originality I chose to think a little bit outside the box, shake things up a little. Y'know, I thought I'd actually have a go at being original and creative, try to expand the possibilities for comment, make things a little bit more interesting for all concerned.

Also, the Reed Richards thing was already covered...

",,,so tell me more about this outreach program..."

"I never order Octopus in this place. "

I've never yet worked out why this restaurant is called 'Men Who Have Been Run Over By ASteamroller''

"The pattern on this carpet is the worst I have ever seen!"

"I'm leaving you"
"f*ck you"
"f*ck you"
"f*ck you"
"..."

Nice work everyone, some pretty funny stuff.

In case you guys want to do another one:



And if you actually want to enter your caption, just CLICK HERE. You can find a bunch of previous contests and new caption contests (weekly thing) right here:

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/caption/

f*ck you, I'm a Mexican.

i can't believe it. i lost my job, my home, my wive and i was just fighting a toddler for his lunchables, but at least i got these pimpin Mexican clothes!