PSA: Optimal food supplies for disasters

[saxitoxin]

I asked ChatGPT how much food I should have stockpiled for various disasters.

• Car wreck in front of my house: no stockpiling needed
  I learn my friend is gay: no stockpiling needed
  49ers lose the Super Bowl: 1 day
  Earthquake: 3 days
  Tsunamai: 3 days
  Lahar: 3 days
  War with Canada: 2 weeks
  Snow storm: 2 weeks
  Nuclear plant meltdown: 1 month
  War with China: 3 months
  Pandemic: 3 months
  Civil war: 3 months
  Eruption of the Yellowstone Caldera: 12 months
  Asteroid Impact: 12 months
  Major Nuclear War: 12 months
  Invasion by a Non-Human Intelligence: 12+ months

[mookiemcgee]

Does current status quo of aliens living among us default to 12+ months? or are we talking real invasion military style from AI/ExtraTs?

[saxitoxin]

Does current status quo of aliens living among us default to 12+ months? or are we talking real invasion military style from AI/ExtraTs?

I assume the covert abduction and forced interspecies breeding program doesn't require any extra food. So you should be okay.

[Pack Rat]

As long as you have neighbors, no need to go hungry.
https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/56737584

[2dimes]

2 weeks for a snow storm huh?

So around 1998 we had a pretty serious snow storm over night. I had a Jeep TJ at the time so, I called the guy I was car pooling with and asked if he wanted to go see if anyone else was there. I figured we might be able to put a note on the door and go home or something. He was game so I picked him up and off we went.

When we arrived several others also had 4 wheel drives with decent tires, including someone with keys to the building, so we were able to just head in for work. Not shocked but mildly surprised since it was well over a foot of snow that had accumulated.

Probably about 75% of the staff called in.

The best part of this story was the young guy who somehow drove his lowered Chevrolet S-10 to work, yet got stuck in the parking lot. Ah, to be eighteen.

A few days later most of the city was ploughed or at least tracked by four wheel drives or cars with snow tires, so everyone was back to work.

[Lonous]

I use to have a plan for 2 months of provisions.
But a couple years ago the neighbors traded their mastiffs in for Shih tzus.
So currently I could probably cover a missed lunch.

[Funkyterrance]

Nice story, 2-dimes!

Everyone knows it’s toilet paper, not food, that you need in the event of a catastrophe.

[Votanic]

Idiots. Obviously, this is the ET Attack in question.


In this random sample barrage.

• The dried-out, non-juicy details from ABC's mid-season primetime re-scheduling.
• The Fall Guy's ratings shame exposed.
• Rae Dawn Chong with a bazooka.
• Does David Carradine march to a different flautist?

Of course, we all now know the answer to that last one is an unqualified 'Yes!?!'

[2dimes]

Hey FT, were you caught in a disaster?

I hope you're back for a while and this isn't just a hit and run.

If you run out of food you might not need toilet paper after a few days.

I have another snow storm story. My buddy was working in Texas and they had what would be a pretty light snow storm here. It shut down the area big time. He was reading the newspaper in the morning and his mobile phone rings. He answered and it was his boss checking up on him. After some discussion the boss asked, "Where are you?" He said, "At the rig." His boss asked how he got there? He had to explain how winter was a fact of life for almost half the year here, so the gravity of the situation didn't occur to him, he just got up and drove in.

[HitRed]

Trump isn’t on the list

[Funkyterrance]

Hey FT, were you caught in a disaster?

I hope you're back for a while and this isn't just a hit and run.

If you run out of food you might not need toilet paper after a few days.

Valid point and cheers, matey!

[saxitoxin]

2 weeks for a snow storm huh?

So around 1998 we had a pretty serious snow storm over night. I had a Jeep TJ at the time so, I called the guy I was car pooling with and asked if he wanted to go see if anyone else was there. I figured we might be able to put a note on the door and go home or something. He was game so I picked him up and off we went.

When we arrived several others also had 4 wheel drives with decent tires, including someone with keys to the building, so we were able to just head in for work. Not shocked but mildly surprised since it was well over a foot of snow that had accumulated.

Probably about 75% of the staff called in.

The best part of this story was the young guy who somehow drove his lowered Chevrolet S-10 to work, yet got stuck in the parking lot. Ah, to be eighteen.

A few days later most of the city was ploughed or at least tracked by four wheel drives or cars with snow tires, so everyone was back to work.

Maybe for a snow storm in Alberta.

Now imagine there's a snow storm in Miami. You're gonna wish you had those two weeks.

[GaryDenton]

We have inherited the contents of a major hoarder plus some contents from a couple of other people in the last 12 months.
By major hoarding, a real psychological problem, he had filled his house, a large storage shed, some in his neighbor's house, and dozens of plastic storage boxes outside.

[KoolBak]

I have enough ammo so that I'll never run out of food ;o)

[Votanic]

We have inherited the contents of a major hoarder plus some contents from a couple of other people in the last 12 months.
By major hoarding, a real psychological problem, he had filled his house, a large storage shed, some in his neighbor's house, and dozens of plastic storage boxes outside.

What was he hoarding?
If it truly has no value (to you), then you can probably get rid of it in a day.
However, if you do suspect it is in some ways valuble, then maybe your complaints about this inherited hoard are hypocritical.

Unless the items are decomposing, radioactive, or leaking toxic waste, I suggest you should treasure and meticulously explore this as-yet-undefined trove.

[mookiemcgee]

I have enough ammo so that I'll never run out of food ;o)

What does ammo taste like?

[KoolBak]

Freedom

[Votanic]

Freedom

Original or extra-crispy?

[mookiemcgee]

Freedom

Original or extra-crispy?

Deep frying ammo is not recommended by the manufacturer

[KoolBak]

So, mook ....how many bottles of wine are appropriate for a family of 4, for a 1 month supply?

[bigtoughralf]

Depends what you mean by food supplies tbh.

I have enough in the house to eat properly for a few days. After that I could fill my stomach three times a day for another few days, but it wouldn't be a properly balanced and nutritious diet. In which case I might as well just go hungry till reinforcements arrive.

Either way that means I tick three days instead of two weeks.

[Votanic]

Depends what you mean by food supplies tbh.

I have enough in the house to eat properly for a few days. After that I could fill my stomach three times a day for another few days, but it wouldn't be a properly balanced and nutritious diet. In which case I might as well just go hungry till reinforcements arrive.

Either way that means I tick three days instead of two weeks.

Wait... You have food so bad that starvation becomes the more heathful option?
...or is this about to segue into a pro-ana thread?

[saxitoxin]

Depends what you mean by food supplies tbh.

I have enough in the house to eat properly for a few days. After that I could fill my stomach three times a day for another few days, but it wouldn't be a properly balanced and nutritious diet. In which case I might as well just go hungry till reinforcements arrive.

Either way that means I tick three days instead of two weeks.

You live in the UK. There's not gonna be an earthquake, a caldera, the 49ers losing the Super Bowl, a tsunamai, a lahar ... and the most dangerous animal you have is Ollie, the slightly permanently inebriated ex-rugby player on the next block over. You should be fine keeping a packet of Jaffa cakes in your nightstand.

[Funkyterrance]

You should be fine keeping a packet of Jaffa cakes in your nightstand.

Pervert!

[Votanic]

You should be fine keeping a packet of Jaffa cakes in your nightstand.

Pervert!

Be prepared. After the bombs drop, you're gonna have to know how to 'roll your own'.