Saxi's Alternate Dispute Resolution Forum

[2dimes]

What is it? If this retainer thingy is more than my screen name I may have to settle out of court. You'll want to wait for spring to bring it by. Even though it's a chinook out and the local folks are in shorts and stuff you'd freeze amigo.

[nietzsche]

I cannot say it's tequila because we would be in another legal battle. That thing is 1 Gallon of Destilado de Agave, must be around 5 bucks.

[2dimes]

How many people have died drinking it?

[thegreekdog]

I cannot say it's tequila because we would be in another legal battle.

I loled.

[nietzsche]

I'm not really sure. We do sell similar brand in smaller bottles in our store. You get a great profit from them, more than 100% . A bottle of that and cheap cigarrettes for many regulars that come for it 2-3 times a day.

[2dimes]

Can you give my some rough odds of my chances of survival after drinking it?

[nietzsche]

it depends ...if you drink the whole gallon and you are:

driving -- 10%
flying -- 5%
sitting at home alone -- 50%
sitting at home with friends with cellphone -- 65%
at the hospital -- 90%

[2dimes]

In my current form and age, I'm pretty sure the odds of me ending up in the hospital after drinking the entire gallon in one day are pretty high. 90+%

[john9blue]

i think he meant "where are you at time of consumption"

[2dimes]

The hospital he talks about must be Mexican ones. Sure the Kanuck hospitals are in some ways not as good as they were but they can handle Alc. poisoning like a boss.

Edit: well my face is red. I was reading those as odds of my demise. Inability to pay attention FTW!

[jonesthecurl]

f*ck.

tgd, can you get me out of this? you surely haven't forgotten when you were a real lawyer...

Real toilet-head, you mean.
Like... ah, yez knows like who.

[notyou2]

Accuser: notyou2
Accused: bigballinstalin
Adjudicator: saxitoxin
Request: public apology

bbs needs to publicly apologize for trivializing the deaths of 6 million innocent people.

Please refer to JB's thread.

SECOND REQUEST

[BigBallinStalin]

Accuser: bigballinstalin
Accused: notyou2
Adjudicator: saxitoxin
Request: public apology

notyou2 needs to publicly apologize for trivializing the deaths of 6 million innocent people

Please refer to this thread.

[notyou2]

I apologize.

[saxitoxin]

nietzsche is temporarily in charge

[2dimes]

I thought you said you'd never leave him in charge of anything after you sent him on a beer run in '82. Did you forget so soon?

[saxitoxin]

I thought you said you'd never leave him in charge of anything after you sent him on a beer run in '82. Did you forget so soon?

True, but in fairness I think he was 18 months old when I sent him on that beer run in '82.

[2dimes]

Sure he's more mature. I'll give him that but he's not much better at driving now is he?

[notyou2]

What happened to Raoul? Why couldn't he sit in for now. I demand a verdict in the case I filed.

[nietzsche]

Alright alright, let's get this office in shape. We need to give resolution to all pending cases.

On the case 2dimes vs nietzsche, I declare the accused, nietzsche, free of all charges. 2dimes has to pay for the stress brought into nietzsche for the false accusation a bottle of the finest canadian maple syrup.


On the case of Manbungalow vs nietzsche, I declare the acussed, nietzsche, free of all charges. For the false accusation, ManBungalow has to use a signature of VioIet with mustache for a week.


On the case of notyou2 vs BBS, I declare the accused, BBS, guilty as charged. BBS has to write a poem for notyou2.

On the case of BBS vs notyou2, I declare the accused, notyou2, guilty as charged. As punishment, notyou2 has to post a pic off himself wearing a fancy hat in the Post a Pic of yourself thread.

[nietzsche]

Accused: Army Of GOD
Accuser: nietzsche
Adjudicator: nietzsche
Request: Tickets for RedSox vs Yankees at Fenway within the next 3 years.

Army of GOD blocked me in FB only because I talked to a Female Scharzeneger not knowing she was underage.

[nietzsche]

Accused: Army Of GOD
Accuser: nietzsche
Adjudicator: nietzsche
Request: Tickets for RedSox vs Yankees at Fenway within the next 3 years.

Army of GOD blocked me in FB only because I talked to a Female Scharzeneger not knowing she was underage.

I find the accused Army of GOD guilty. Request granted.

[thegreekdog]

Accused: Nietzsche
Accuser: thegreekdog
Adjudicator: Nietzsche
Request: Impeachment for self-adjudication.

[notyou2]

None of Nietzches verdicts are valid because he didn't write "signed by my hand....."

I declare mistrials in all of his judgements, except the one where he found BBS guilty.

[nietzsche]

Accused: Nietzsche
Accuser: thegreekdog
Adjudicator: Nietzsche
Request: Impeachment for self-adjudication.

Rejected.

Signed in my hand.. nietzsche